Script (working)
Opening monologue by narrator
opening shots consist of VARIOUS VIDEO GAME FOOTAGE, WITH VIGNETTE OF GAMER JAV JAVINSON (JAVIN DANA)
Narrator
Welcome to "EXTREME GAMING BEHIND THE SCENES" Where we get the dirt on the hottest gaming icons and interview them with no respect to their private lives while providing absolutely nothing of substance! Today we have Jav Javinson of Super Smash Bros. Melee fame. He is considered... THE WORST FIGHTING GAME PLAYER IN EXISTENCE.
Shifts to just outside the interview building (pre-interview)
Jav
So I heard I'm being interviewed because I'm one of the best video game players in the world? I mean I don't like to brag but...
Cameramen stare at each other, uncertain.
Cameramen 1
Well uhhh, like.
JAV
Great! I'll be plucking my eyebrows until you're ready, see you there.
Cameramen both sigh.
Interview scene
JAV
I've been dedicated to playing games competitively for about 18 years now, and I'm 17 years old...so it's kind of a big deal. I haven't broken into the mainstream competitions yet, I've been spending years honing my craft in the "underground scene". Which is why I haven't won a single tournament...or a match.....I'm indie as f*ck so I can get away with it.
NARRATOR
Javinson has been tearing up the indie scene with a white hot record of 0-124 in Super Smash Bros Melee, yet he refuses to quit the sport, showing absolute determination and perseverance.
JAV
You know I have a family to feed so I take my profession very seriously.
Javin pulls out a bag of Doritos from his backpack, eats them on screen obnoxiously for a few seconds.
NARRATOR
We sat down with Javinson to play a round of his game of expertise and test his skills, because we couldn't think of any remotely intelligent questions to ask!